My deariest apology

What happens if tomorrow, never comes. Does that make the good things you have done today, out balance the bad things you had done in the past. Or does it count for anything that you were going to do great things tomorrow. How does it feel to know that this could be your last day that the sun shines on your good graces? What would you say, what words would you choose to begin....


Well me I don't know, I guess I would start with asking for forgiveness, from God, for not being everything expected of me in his name. I guess I would wanna apologize to my little brother who I really never got a chance to understand or know because we were so busy kicking each other's ass, instead of loving each other as brothers and sticking up for one another. I would definitely have to apologize to my big brother for any bad things I have ever said, and understand that even I though he could have set better examples in life, that he is not me and how can I place him on a scale that he does not wish to be on.

I want to apologize the people I past on the street that ask me for a coin that I had to spare in my possession, but did not give, due to the fact that I didn't want my money to go towards drugs and or alcohol. Nor didn't I want to be apart the increase in lung cancer by tobacco corporation. Though it hurt me to past judgement, it hurt those of unfortunate worst, because maybe my quarter or dollars that's day could have a different between one more day of starvation, or a cheese burger from McDonald's. Instead of the the chewing gum I spent it on, or the snicker, I fed on to fulfill my chocolate craving.


How can I say sorry to those friends that I lost along the way, over my foolish attitude. The one's that I loved dearly, and hurt so bad, that I could never find words deep, or sincere enough to say, "I am SORRY". Please for give me, forgive me my friends, I left you with impressions of no need of your love, and yet months and years past and the tears my soul cry, are prayers that where ever you all are, and what ever yall are doing in life, that it be blessed. If I could change the hands of time I would resolve past issues, and instead throwing them a way.

I want to send out a dear apology to my great grandmother. May her soul rest in peace. My last words with her where rush, because of extra curriculum activities, and the day she departed this earth, I should have took the time to listen to her say goodbye, and said goodbye to her. Now and days we are so disregarded of our elders, that we forget that there days are final, my last words should have been, "I love you". Instead of the blurting out, " I gotta go grandma, I will call you later and just hanging up the phone." Not in acknowledge that later would never come. My great grandmother was dead and gone by the time I made it home that night.

I want to say to my dad, I know we had our differences, but somethings I should keep to myself, when talking to my father. You did your best, and I want to say thanks for the effort of just staying in touch and being there the best u can.I want to apologise to the stranger I crossed in life, and ignored as if they were not human beings. Because somewhere on someday it was a complete stranger who came to my rescue, when I could have been completely ignored as I had ignored others.

Last but not least I want to say sorry to my mommy, I'm sorry, that I am a black gay male. I sorry that you had to choose to love me unconditionally, despite my preference in life. I sorry if you ever wish other plans for me, as for as a wife and family. I sorry that you had to hear me out, when some guy broke my heart. I sorry for the phones calls you got at all hours of the night to hear me cry. I sorry that you had to sit down that day and write my name over and over, and the tears you shed that night when you finally faced the truth with reality. If I could change the way I felt, I would. If I could give you the life for me you wanted me to have I would, but I let you know this, I tried to make up for it, by doing things right in life. I sorry that you had to accept me for who I am. Learn to love me no matter whom I chose to live my life with..but thank you for making the acceptance..I could not have made it to where I am now, without everything moral piece love you invest inside of me.